... but I am so very happy and grateful that I am pregnant and this baby girl is healthy!
It hasn't been the easiest road getting to this point, but I feel like I may have needed these experiences to fully appreciate the miracle and beauty of having a child. Well, I don't have a child yet, but I feel confident that this baby is here to stay.
The road getting to this point started December 2009. Josh and I decided we were ready to have a child. So...I got pregnant. No problems...easy as pie. I had a couple ultrasounds during the course of this pregnancy and everything was looking good. At 14 weeks we went in for a normal appointment. No heartbeat. I had an ultrasound. No movement. No heartbeat. I thought I was over the miscarriage scare part of the pregnancy. Wrong.
The next day, March 24, I had the routine surgery to remove the baby.
I was numb from any sort of emotion. In fact, all I wanted to do was run away from life.
It is crazy that this happens to so many women, so it shouldn't be a big deal, right?
Well, it was a big deal for me. It took me about 6 months to climb out of the dark place I put myself in.
I was finally ready to try again. In August, Josh and I headed out on the most amazing vacation to Australia and New Zealand. I got pregnant. Once again, easy as pie. No problems. I only knew I was pregnant a week when I started to miscarry. The odd thing was that during that week I kept saying, "third time's a charm". I guess I sort of knew that the second time wasn't the time.
Third time's a charm...
After that miscarriage, I wanted to keep trying right away. So...two weeks later, I found out I was pregnant...once again. I am so glad to know that I have no troubles in the "getting pregnant department". I worry all the time, but have had no troubles at all during this pregnancy.
I am now just a day shy of 23 weeks and couldn't be happier. I am able to feel her move all day, and it is so comforting to know she is kicking, twirling around, and everything is o.k.
I have a ton of ultrasound pics, because I have been going in quite often just to make sure everything looks good.
These are some pics of our baby Lily Belle...
This is when she was just a bean at about 9.5 weeks.
This was my favorite ultrasound, because she was doing flips and moving all over the place.
She is about 12.5 weeks in both of these. I love her little hand waving in the pic above.
At almost 18 weeks we found out we were having a girl! So exciting!
This is a cute profile of Lily Belle at about 18 weeks.
Another great hand shot of baby Lily Belle at 21.5 weeks.
And just to make sure she is really a she, another pic of her girly parts at 21.5 weeks.
Belly shots are kind of funny to me, but oh well!
This is the bump starting to grow around 15 weeks.
Please excuse the dorky face! This is the bump at 22 weeks. I am growing quite fast now!
23 weeks down...17 to go. It feels like I have been pregnant forever!
Lily Belle is expected June 18, 2011. We are thrilled to meet this little one!